Raptor rag gloats over incursion

A dispatch from THAMUS (Celts & CATS leader)

While Raptor Air Patrol's upper echelons continue to issue scarcely credible denials of their illegal invasion of thane airspace, they have been badly let down by their scurrilous tabloid, The Daily Poop, which caters to the bird-brain tastes of their non-predatory twittering classes.
Needless to say, despite pressure to maintain the raptors' diplomatic "deniability," the low-brow rag could not resist typical avian chauvinist gloating over the RAP raid in this morning's edition. It "coincidentally" featured an interview with a certain new "hero" (e.g., viz. EMMUTTMAX, op. cit., ibid.), which must have been prepared well in advance.
Meanwhile, the Canadian sector of the high-class community of artists, writers, photographers, philosophers, naked women, cross dressers, angels and cat lovers known as The Stumbles was also rocked by revelations on its PBS (Personal Broadcasts to Stumblers) radio.
In well-sourced leaks from recent diplomatic exchanges, an unnamed senior raptor diplomat was heard disparagingly dismissing the views of "all those feline fanatics in The Stumbles" on the conflict. He boasted that birds had "no need to fear Celtic moggies as our new air and ground forces are more than a match for them".
This use of the "M" word to describe the favorite animal companion of The Stumbles has outraged the community, apart from a few sniggering owners of small dogs and hamsters.
Irish Wolfhound and Red Setter spokeshounds swiftly issued a statement saying they and the Celtic feline community had a close friendship dating back to the 10th century that far outweighed minor cross-species differences. "Celtic first; united cats, dogs and thanes second," the statement said, adding that it would not be duped by cheap foreign simian-avian fabrications.
In a further anti-feline cover-up, the wily Emmuttmax released an old and well-known picture of an innocent junior cat manager being harassed by a gross corporate simian, and attempted to pass it off as "friendship."
The coarse monkey in question narrowly escaped prosecution by making an ex gratia compensation payment, which his former feline employee (name protected) later dismissed as "peanuts."